I had a full and a half one of your drinks

Unashamed, im gonna show my scars

Highway bound

....with eyes that burn so bright, they make me pure

Beyond and to all time, I stand.

Love.

Hate.

Clouds.....

ITS NOT FUCKING FAIR

Oh, there's room in the middle

So, there might be two blogs today. I cant decide. Maybe if i feel like writing another. But this one is going to be all lyrics that are the present. whatever. dont read it if you dont care.

- MURDER is a family value in almost every home!

- so i hold my tongue, forget the song, tie my shoe and start walking off, try to just keep moving on with my broken heart and my absent god, and i have no faith but its all I want.....

- So she said you ain't worth the air that you breathe.
So she said you ain't worth the dirt under your feet.

- Your faith is dead. We dont have to live like this. Get off your knees: your faith is dead.

- I've forgotten my name. I'm sick and weak and fresh from sleep.

- The tongue of god is but a stranger in these desperate times.

- "Thou shalt not kill," "Thou shalt not steal".......unless it benefits you.

- Shaking under this duality

- Death wont hold you as tight as she will

- Started to sink like the moon tends to do if you stare at it too long...
Then you blink and its gone

- One thousand lifetimes couldn't replace what you've given me: cold nights of sacrifice and dedication

- Within or without, I'm CHAINED by the dream

- 9 o'clock and you paint the skies gray. It's not your fault we're the ones who betray

- The guilty and the innocent hang the same .... deliever us!!

- The void and the light are both me.....

- You speak of a fever that burns you inside
As you explain to your mother how you've wanted to die

- HOW CAN YOU SAY IT WITH SUCH EASE?

- The strength of my high is the strength of my low. Unless there is no me.... THEY BOTH EXPLODE.

When i say drummond, you say wedding. Drummond.........

It's Unfinished

working title: the birds on the other side

i just wanted to put up what i had so you can all tell me what you think?

When there's a fire put out
With the ice that you find
Hiding behind all the colors and lines
That you took from the sea
Of the night that she cried
Drowning for once in her lifetime,
When you gave her your word
It was truth that she heard
Shining in your eyes
But that night was too blurred
From the pleasant surprise
Of a heart in disguise
Always beautiful but blind.
Her reflection is wrong
She's been lost for too long.
She sees ones in the past;
All the souls that are gone,
Its abstract; but an abstract view can be strong
To explain the things that elude her
Because she fines herself trapped
In conversations that lapse
For hours on end; an inadequate pass
When her lifes full of thought
From the songs she was taught
That come once and again just to save her....

Fireflies Through a Kaleidoscope

You were born within a sheltered cage
One you may leave but return to
If you can't break out from just a dream,
Noone will come and tend to you.
In light that shines upon your face,
In the figures that rest in your mind,
There's an idea you can't put into words
When the songs that he sings are the truth that you find.

There's colors that sing in the depth of your bones
Laid in regret, in the blue of your lies
We decidedly speak, but all turn to sleep
As you laugh at yourself because you thought you were wise.

It's the green of the truth you found in your youth
Worries retreating like the shy but stern waves;
It's nothing like the red of the present
Where our meaningless? lives fade into gray.

Its just a word. And words have no meaning when you're stuck in a reverie

My Top Ten Albums of 2005

So, taking after Trey, im going to do what i think is the top ten albums of 2005. But I'm not going to put in pictures casue i just dont want to take the time. This is also on the audioblog but i decided i would post here too.
Okay.

1) As Cities Burn
Son, I Loved You At Your Darkest

This is the debut cd from a band that nobody has really heard of. The cd contains only around thirty minutes of music, but every second of it is worth it. Layered with religious influences, the lyrics are able to lift you up or push you down. The band gets across their message, whether or not it's religious. The cd starts off by jumping right in with an in-your-face kind of song. It slows down for only one track until the final, epic ending.

2) Bright Eyes
Motion Sickness

Motion Sickness is a live recording, and yet I still believe it places above Digital Ash.. because of the pure emotion that you can only hear live. The song choices may not be the best but there are songs such as Southern State and Make War where Connor's shaky voice never lets you doubt the ultimate truth of his words.

3) Bright Eyes
Digital Ash in a Digital Urn

This was one of two simultanious releases. The only problem I can see in this album is that everything sounds too much of the same, with the exception of a few tracks. I feel like the lyrics do not quite have the depth that the ones before do. Yet, songs such as Gold Mine Gutted really show Oberst's ability to songwrite.

4) Trivium
Ascendancy

Wow. This cd really blew me away. This guy has one of the best screams ive heard. Not only that, he has a very good voice. Many times, even when you least expect it, screams will be overlayed with clean vocals. There is plenty of raw emotion in this album for anyone to hear, regardless of if you are into metal records or not.

5) As I Lay Dying
Shadows are Security

As I Lay Dying has been one of my favorite bands for three years. This album does now show the brilliance that is Frail Words Collapse, but it is still a good album, especially if you're trying to get into metal. Their songs are easy to listen to and get into. I only wish they had written more lyrics and had less repetition.

6) Death Cab for Cutie
Plans

This is where I disagree with Trey. I think Transatlanticism is a much better record. It has better lyrics, it is better musically, and it has better messages. Nevertheless, Plans is a brilliant album. There are songs in the middle that seems like filler, but songs such as Marching Bands of Manhattan, I Will Follow You Into the Dark, and What Sarah Said really grasp a listener's attention.

7) Children of Bodom
Are You Dead Yet?

Once again, this is not as good as their previous efforts. They have developed more of a nu-metal edge. However, this is still Bodom. The amazing solos are still there. The harsh lyrics and vocals are still there. It makes for a kickass live show.

8) Panic! At The Disco
A Fever You Can't Sweat Out

This is just plain catchy. It isn't the sort of music I would find myself listening to, but for some reason i can't seem to put it down. These guys also put on a great live show, although it would be better if they had more material. This album never fails to seem original and the lyrics never cease to amuse me.

9) From Autumn to Ashes
Abandon Your Friends

I believe this album is completely carried by three tracks: Kansas City 90210, Placentapede, and Abaondon Your Friends. In my opinion, these three songs are good enough to put this at the ninth best album of the year. Kansas City 90210 is a slower song with catchy lyrics. Placentapede will send a chill down your spine with the combination of clean vocals and screams. Abandon Your Friends is a slow, acoustic song that anyone would love to sing along with. Demanding. Detriment.

10) Nine Inch Nails
With Teeth

Don't get me wrong, this cd is good. It still makes it in the top ten. The problem I have with Nine Inch Nails is that their studio recordings are really not who they are. Their live show is so much better, and all of the electronic sounds are replaced with keyboards and guitars. The live energy could never be matched in a studio setting. Also, the song Only is horrible. If you want to hear something close to what their potential is, get And All That Could Have Been, a live recording.


This concludes my top ten albums of 2005. If you disagree, I don't care.
It's an opinion.

-mike

But you drank her sweat like ht was wine, and you lay with her on a bed of blue. And its awful sweet, like the fruit she cuts and feeds to you.

And to all the times we were lying on your floor wearing your greatest dreams.

hey look! its creation!

props to me for my first post in a while.
except for that other one!!! yay!

so pretty much(lol), my life is different. apologies to everyone ive been weird around lately. At least theres only one more week until vacation, and ive been invited to go snowboarding by a few different people so that should be fun if i decide to go.

narnia is great! so see it! NOW. YES NOW GET OUT OF UR CHAIR.

lol i acutally made myself laugh! could i be any more pathetic? uhh other than that i saw panic at the disco/ weatherbox at soma on friday. wow. panic is surprisingly good live and weatherbox had a really really big impact on me.

and the clearing grew
and began to bend
and all the sunlight
started pouring in
and you walked up
all bathed in light
you stripped me naked
you held me tight

so maybe it doesnt mean anything to you, but whatever.

so not much to say right now but i will be back.

You're always preaching not to be numb when thats how you thrive.
You pretend to create and observe when you really detach from feeling alive.

Ashes of the Week or Ashes of the Weak

I held your hand on the last day of the year
The first time I really realized where I was
All the way home every mile screamed a different word;
Every bend or hill echoed your name
And the possibility of tomorrow or yesterday that I let slip away.
It isn't fair to her but it's all about you.
Sleep to wake.
Wake to dream.
Dream of sleep.
The echoes of the rythm are only an expression of who they are
The only sounds that matter are the ones we don't want to hear.
They tell me it's about love when it's about life.
I can't go home when you're not waiting there,
So what makes it home anyway?
Forteen feet from the bottom
Floating on nothing;
So easy to turn around and hit the bottom.
But you're still so close that I can breathe you in.
Like the ashes of another time.
Another place.
Burning out.

Everywhere its not the same. Something about the daylight makes it okay.

Kiss me goodbye, I'm defying gravity

Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost!

Il pleut dans mon coeur comme il pleut sur la ville.

...i hate the fall

i heard every word

There's only us
There's only this
Forget regret
Or life is yours to miss
No other road
No other way
No day but today

i know...

or well, theres alot of things i wish i knew.

i hate when theres things that are kept to oneself that really are for other people.
what are best friends for anyways?
ive been thinking alot lately, and im just going to apologize in advance for not saying anything straight out. cause i cant think like that right now anyways

you know?
its you and me
its us
its just too bad those arent the same thing
in either case


like,
why cant i bring myself to do the things that i KNOW i should do?
why do i feel bad doing or saying things that should be done or said.
a conscience? maybe, i dont know.
some things are so right and i cant bring myself to admit it! grrrrrr

hey, at least i understand myself
well good going, mike
you missed the opportunity once
dont miss it again

feels too damn much like home

"Why are you so far away," she said.

The Realist

Please just this once do this for me,
I've seen you in clouded visions saying goodbye...
I remember when we were going to sit eachother down and explain ourselves
Always busy
Blame myself.
Always busy, blame myself.
Your color was blue, myself is making me feel this way
I apologize....
You're old enough to take care of...
If we can't speak go back to your bed so you'll be here when I wake up.
And I'm worried with no reason why.
Harm is an acquantance and it says it's not very fond of you.
Just this once "stay" I say.
"I'll see you soon" he says.
Until you come back, I will stay awake.

A) The view from here is .... B) A brick wall

Covered from head to toe in lighting;
it's constantly changing when I'm around.
Days left, before this is over and done with.
The sheets keep whispering, "will you make it through this day?"
I'll practice making scenarios that aren't really there.
The corner hasn't helped in so long,
It speeds everything up now.
Back and forth, walking every piece of baggage off of me.
Hope when it hits they ground,
They turn to ash.....
Sing the words even though they don't make sense at all.
I believe letters keep me warm.
I believe letters keep me company.
Tonight and forever in this room with mood lighting.
Even though it doesn't make sense.......

Stick to the side roads, they held interesting thoughts. YOU SEE WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE

un meurtrier

La voiture que quelqu'un a condruit.
La route que quelqu'un a pris.
La place de parking ou quelqu'un s'est gare.
L'aeroport ou quelqu'un est arrive.
L'avion que quelqu'un est monte.
Le ciel ou quelqu'un a vole.
La montagne ou quelqu'un s'est ecraser.
Le feu ou quelqu'un a brule vif.

we looked like GIANTS

planes make me happy. thank you hallie.
paper airplanes(makeshift wings) is amazing.
just as long as noone knows all motion is pantomime.

tomororw i have to go in at lunch for a chem lab. bummer. oh well. i guess nothign too big has happened recently, but i'm happy. im turning 16 on saturday but i guess i dont really care much. im getting that guitar finally! water polo takes up life. too much of life.

hallie is break.
break is important.
even if it happens for five seconds and not every day.
thank you.
so much.


dancing in the rain of descending ash, dancing on your grave
i'll see you all falling.

i'd stop it had you a heart.
lots of my teachers are stupid, and i hate it when peopel get on yoru back for homework and not trying hard enough in a polo game or something when its not even important to you. as of now, ive pretty much decided im quitting polo anyways next year. im kinda sick of glenn saying stuff that doesnt acutlaly MEAN anything and being a crappy coach. i'm sick of mr williams asking if i did my homework. no, i didnt. sorry.

but you make me happy. YOU're what i care about.

oh and i got into the play! thats really fun and i really enjoy it!! yay!!!
:)

thanks for the listening!

mike

The sheep eyed it dubiously...

Math & Tomas with +3 Attack Speed

So in math today, we had a practice problem to do. Instead of doing it, Tomas drew a tatoo thingy on his arm. Because he's Tomas. And I'm like, are you even doing this, and hes like NO DUDE i drew this! It gives me plus three attack speed! so usually, id pucnh like this *punches air*. But now, i punch like this!! *punches air faster.* HAHAHAHAHAHA

Other good things: I got to see mck yesterday which made me so happy.

And i just broke a guitar string. thats not really good but its of interest so i decided id put it.

you dont see me

A Picture Share!

Hmmmm? Is it just me or is the main singer of green day trying to grab her ass?

I need you so much closer

Sunday Morning Souplantation

Souplantation sunday morning is amazing. I woke trey up early to go with me. Not only do they have all their normal food, but between 9 and 12 they have a bunch of breakfast foods. They have like scrambled eggs, belgian waffles, french toast, cinnamon rolls, and the like. It's all really good. So everyone should come with us next sunday!!! It's only at two souplantations too and the carmel valley one is one of them.

A Picture Share!

Anna making out with a stuffed dinosaur. Enough said.

Life is only as good as the memories we make

I could almost see you breathing

Tuesday went to stevo's house. Guitar, lots of it. Very fun, learned alot of stuff. He wants me to play with him, start a band or something. He already has a vocalist, drummer, and bassist so thatd be pretty interesting. Who knows.
Went home, didnt do much, talked to mck for alot.

Wednesday is today.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MCKENZIE!!!
Woke up at 12, didnt do much. Around 4 30 i went to highlands with anna, had starbucks and la salsa. Watched garden state. Its amazing, it was my 11th time. Definately my favorite movie. Afterwards, we were sitting around listening to random songs and mishka showed up. Katie and mck called and asked if we could go drive up there nad give them garden state.
I was reluctant, but it turned out REALLY fun.
I got us there hte looongest way possible. we took the 5 to the 805 to the 163. We could have just taken the 5. IT was really fun though, and we sat around and talked to them for a while. On the way home we got boba. Mck and kt are watching hte movie now and im excited to see what kt things.

Being half dead wasn't what I planned to be,
Now I'm ready to be free.

Street Scene

Street scene was friday and saturday, as you know. On friday, the only bands i ACUTUALLY saw were Hot Hot Heat and the Killers. I was sitting on the ground near the captain morgan stage during Louis XIV, so i saw part of them too. Hot hot heat was...well...like they usually are. We waited through teh whole set to see goodnight, goodnight. Louis XIV sounded really good but i dindt get to hear finding out true love is blind. For most of the night, i walked around with mck and her friends. that was acutally really fun, so it wasnt like i wasted the day or anything. THE KILLERS ARE AMAZING. It was easily the best thing on friday, and very possibly the best live set ive seen (haha, the other competitor was on saturday. both street scene sets). Went to dennys afterwards, got home later.

Saturday i saw many more bands. First, we saw spoon which i acutally enjoyed alot. I bought a killers shirt. Met up with mck and hung out with her for a while. Me, anna, and trey went and stood in line to get stuff signed by the used. We were in line for a freaking hourrrrr!! ugh! Good thing htat was during death cab for cuties set. They were really really good and im downloading some of their cds right now. Anyways, i got my ticket signed by the used and its on my wall now. We walked over and saw unwritten law. Unwritten law was pretty good live, but it was jsut alright. Nothing too special. After that, trey left and me and anna watched hte used. WOW.

The used were fucking amazing. Either that or hte killers was the best thing ive seen live, and id have to say it was probably the used. I dont like the used's cds all taht much, but live was amazing. the evergy was at 100% the entire time, and they played a great collection of songs.
The ending was amazing. That guy can scream. Anna knows what i mean. I sort of wish that we had met them AFTER their set though, i would have said some stuff isntead of just getting my ticket signed. Oh well it was a great time.

After that, i went and met up with mck again. We watched some of hte pixies and went to inflatable land & that was pretty mcuh it for the night. The pixies werent anything special. We drove mck home, then went to dennys again. LOL it was really funny. I got home and CRASHED. I was super dead the next day. Anna's house and starbucks. That's it.

Today -- nothing yet, ive read like 250 pages of mck's book, and im going to the movies w/ matt at 7 45. that should be fun.

mars volta / system of a down on saturday!!!! :)

-mike

Time was so tangible, I'll never let it go...

ghost stories handed down reached secret tunnels below.......

mmm i had another test today. afi is good. anyways after school my mom made me finish up a bunch of work, but i have no more homework for the rest of the week!!! i went and hung out and we went to the highlands, and we saw brian and anna! anna had to go to school :( but we hung out with brian and just drove places...nowehre....places. yeah....then we went to souplantation.

.......and everyone was dancing.
nothing could touch us then.
noone could change us then.
everyone was dancing.
nothing could hurt us then.
noone could see us then.
everyone was dancing, everyone was dancing........

lets not forget all of the screaming of under the gun in the car!! OMG WHAT THE HELL why can mck only go to street scene till 9!! all of the good bands start AFTER 9!!! UGHHHH oh well! anyways so i came home, learned some songs on guitar, nothing really hard but oh well it was fun. i really dont want summer to be over!! but if you think about it, theres only another month or so. and sorry i never use caps, im really too lazy. brian is on crack, i swear.

............noone could see me

it's doing the right thing no matter of the consequence

this morning, joe was 45 mins late bringing the project to school. WHAT THE HELL???? oh well...we did well and i think we got an A! After shcool i went and hung out with anna. we were going intot he movies and some lady said like 'oh it was 10 inches'!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. We saw the island. its good, but hte music is this tribal drumming thing NO AMTTER WHAT HTE SCENE IS!! Even if its a sad scene, its tribal drumming. grr. Lol and when they first kiss, hes like oh that tongue thing is amazing, and shes like i know, open your mouth again. LOL!!! and the movie is bullshit. they fall off the 70th story of a building and live....enough said. it was entertaining though!

three more days of school. almost there....except for a final on friday.

STREET SCENE IN TWO DAYS!!!

crystal clear, i see the rose is frail
the thorns hide easily in it's beauty
as i go to grasp it in my hand
my heart is torn, beating, from my chest

resurrected memories from ashes

today...was fun! School --> joes house. On the way we went to sombreros to get burritos and there was this car infront of us and his sister was like I WANT BURRITOS; MOVE YOU FUCKING BUTTPLUGS!! it was hilarious! (hahaha matt...is that b-u-t-t-p-l-u-g? no offense to liz of coruse....shes just...uhh special?) I painted his kitchen. Yes, the entire kitchen. His sister helped us put together the acual board for the project due tomorrow, and it looks really good. Thats pretty much all for today.....i HAD weight training 5-6 but i got there and noone was there so whatever. Im supposed to have practice at 8, but we'll see if i actually do or not ??

Other than that...umm....i wana talk to anna?
and mck might be coming over tomrorow!!

street scene friday & saturday, very excited. everyone should go!

The hardest part isn't finding out who we need to be, it's being content with who we are.
Stay who you are.

-mike

im back!!

wow i realized i havent posted since july 15........and actually since july 4. I wish i could remember what i had done between then and now. Ive had summer school, and its been alot better recently. Ive been hanging out with mck alot :-D. i havnt dun much of hanging out with people. OH!! there was a lingerie night somewhere in there which was really fun i thought. The week after that i also went to rocky which was just okay. I crashed at annas that night and there was talk about more depressing stuff. I think.
Why is everything depressing? ive realized recently taht even though many people (including myself) bitch at everything possible........theres really no reason. Life is good. Overall. Sure, shitty stuff happens but you get over it and move on. ..........most of the time.
THE MPAA SUCKS! sorry that was random but if ur me you understand.

Anyways, today!
Today i did a whole project. We've had two weeks to do it, and its a partner project. I did the entire thing alone today. other than that i just sat around and listened to alot of coldplay. i fell asleep at one point too, but i dont remember it. i woke up in the middle of water polo! yaaaaaaay. and nowww im sitting around listening to bright eyes and talking to ppl. one more week of summer school! and STREET SCENE is this wekeend...im so excited! as far as i know, theres only three people i know going (and one of them is pissed at me). Week after that is mars volta/system of a down and im excited for that too!

this was a boring blog, im sorry, i dindt have anything to say really i just needed to blog again. hopefully i'll be doing it more regularily now.

They will see us waving from such great heights.......

WEEEEEEEE!

A Picture Share!

Muahahah

have you got anything left to show?

no, no, i didn't think so.

this has been a really fun weekend! yesterday after i blogged i went out to lucnh with my mom, then drove up to clairemont to hang out iwth amy and katie. that was coooool. we saw batman (AGAIN lol) and went to starbucks and the usual stuff. Then we went to amys house. I really like amys house for some odd reason. BRIAN IS HOME!!!!! so thats pretty much all i did yesterday. It's the 4th of july and i have no special plans :(. I think im gonna go hang out with brian though so that'll be cool. I'm hungry now so I'm guna go eat. Adios!

-mike

i believe i can see the future
cause i repeat the same routine
i believe i used to have a purpose
then again, that might have been a dream.
i believe i used to have a voice,
now i never make a sound.
i just do what i've been told,
i really dont want them to come around
every day is exactly the same

longing? obscurity? vanity? emptiness.

Are you in or are you out?
Leave your things behind because it's all going off without you.
Excuse me, you're too busy writing your tragedy.
So let go, jump in, what are you waiting for?
It's all right.

okay, so i havent REALLY posted since thursday.
On friday, i had school, we had a test. harder than the other test (That reminds met aht i have to go do my hw). We watched supersize me and i swear im never eating at mcdonalds again. ewww gross stuff. anyways so i got home and went and hung out with anna. that was pretty cool we just sat around the playground & starbucks and talked bout a buncha stuff. I went home and watched garden state. that movie is........yeah wow. trey and i wer going to hang out later but never ended up hangin out so i went to matts. we watched phantom of the opera and then office space. he's seen that movie 41 times.....thats amazing. anyways i slept there. saturday i got up and my mom called me to bug me a little but thats fine. she wanted me to go to some water polo thing but i dindt really want to so i stayed with matt. we went and saw batman begins. WOW. i was really surprised by that movie, it was alot better than i ever expected it could be. i kinda wanna c it again now. we ran into anna at the highlands between starbucks and the movies but she was with her mom so it was sorta like 'hi' 'bye'. afterwards we walked home and i managed to get us lost.

did i tell all of you about hte time i got me and saphir lost in paris at one in the morning? well i did lol.

anyways so liz called us a while thru and we were making a bunch of jokes about stuff. HAHAHAthen there was this dead mouse on the sidewalk and i was like wtf and matt was like AHHHH. hahahahaha it was hilarious. so we got back to his house. umm i went home and took a shower and grabbed garden state. then we went to liz's house and watched it and ordered pizza and stuff. pizza people should never get a 5 dollar tip. anyways after the movie i was like WOW. it hit me harder than it ever had before. so i was outside and stuff and i walked over to annas house for a while. then i just....went home i guess. watched shaun of the dead and hung out online till around 3 in the morning.

i got a bunch of messages on aim from hallie that made me feel great. so thanks for that :-D!!

now i'm here. and thats that. and life is this. and its not too interesting at the moment. today i have no idea what im doing, tomorrow i ahve no idea what im doing. but BRIANS BACK TODAY SO YAYYY. i mite go to the weatherbox concert tonight also im not quite sure yet.
and mck is back wednesday.

sorry for the long blog.

---------------mike

this is what i am
this is what i have become
what is love without sacrifice?

Aren't you tired?
Because I will carry you on a broken back and blown out knees.
I have been where you are for a while.
After all these images of pain have cut right through you
I will kiss every scar and weep;
You are not alone.
Then I'll show you that place in my chest
Where my heart still tries to beat.
It still tries to beat.

Safe. When im with you i feel so safe. Like im home.

Matt: Actually, annas mom is pretty attractive.

Matt: i had orange julius at the fair, it was really good good. It was strawberry!